1. The Mainbrace
Not-so-secret meeting place with an especially congenial 'Mine
Host'. Skol special is my preferred tipple here. Unless you're
buying, of course. In which case it's a large vodka and coke with
ice. Enough machines, pinball etc. to keep you amused when drinking
alone. Contains the only 'Crystal Maze' I've ever won on. Every night
is party night. Apparently.
2. The Halfway Hotel
Usually pretty empty, which is a good thing. Not for the landlord,
perhaps, but OK for me. It has a jukebox you can actually hear and a
pool table you can actually get on without having a fight. Of course,
once you're on, just make sure you lose. Friday night is karaoke
night.
3. Hull Cheese
Has seen its best days, probably, but holds many happy memories of
late 70's / early 80's when everyone seemed to know everyone else. I
don't know any bugger these days. Also has a great location, smack in
the middle of town, so it's always tempting to pop in as you're
passing. So, let's face it, I do. Sunday night is a busy night (well,
it used to be anyway).
4. The Kingfisher
Not for the faint-hearted, but assuming you can get to the bar
without the piano stopping, you should be OK. I don't go in as much
these days, but when my mates and I used to live round that area, it
proved to be a convivial meeting place. Just don't try using the word
'convivial' in there. Thursday night is Disco night.
5. Yates Wine Lodge
Definitely new to the scene, but quickly establishing itself as a
haven for pissheads. It may be me, but everyone seems permanently
drunk in there. Which is a welcoming sign. I've always wanted to try
a 'blob' or whatever it's called, but the name sounds too
frightening. They do decent food as well. At least it looks
appetising as it wafts by on its way to someone else's table.
6. Jazzbo Brown's
Horribly garish, next door to a bowling alley, makes the Halfway
Hotel look busy, no service to speak of and the beer's not up to
much. Apart from that, it's great! Every night is bloody bowling
night.
7. The Gardeners Arms
Again, mainly a nostalgia trip for me. Mainly notable these days
for a pair of 'His and Hers' pool tables in blue and red. They look
too good to use. It also has an air-hockey game. A must for any pub,
eh? I think not.
8. The White Horse
Rapidly becoming Dave Rotheray's favourite watering hole.
Especially the Saturday afternoons. Unfortunately, I play football so
I tend to miss these, but apparently it's packed out, the beer flows
freely and the strains of 'Alice, Who The Fuck Is Alice?' can be
heard clear to Allders. Which is just up the road and used to be
called Willis Ludlow.
9. Humber St. Andrew's Social Club
OK, so it's not strictly a pub, but you can usually get in if you
avoid the shifty-looking doorman. And when you do, you find yourself
amid a wonderland of darts, pool, snooker, dominoes, club acts and
more darts. An ideal evening for some. Tuesday night is country
night.
10. Star Of The West
Another pub with a rough reputation and one I haven't been in for
a while. Mainly remembered for showing full-length films in the early
80's whilst serving ice-cold Stella Artois. Unfortunately, the
cinemas got wind of this and had it stopped, which was extremely
disappointing. I remember I saw 'Rocky' in there. Obviously, I mean
the film, not Sly Stallone standing at the end of the bar drinking
his egg-nog.
I think it was Judy Garland who said it best. No,
not "Mine's another treble vodka and pass the nembutal", but "there's a place
like home". And, in the picture, you can see my favourite place within that
home. Yes, it's my comfy armchair. Obviously, the exact geographical location
of said chair must remain a closely guarded secret, but I can tell you this.
The telly is just four feet away. And so it's here that I spend many a happy
evening watching various viewing delights. Programmes as diverse as 'The Simpsons'
and 'Due South', as amusing as 'Ellen', 'Frasier' and 'Stars In Their Eyes'
and as savagely entertaining as 'Highlander' and 'The New Adventures of Superman'.
All these can be found just four feet away from the chair you see before you.
The only thing missing from the picture is perhaps an alcoholic beverage of
some sort resting snugly on the arm.
Oh, I also like 'Barney's Beanery' in Los Angeles, but that's another
story . . .